30th
Where’s Cool? News - Announcing Bill
Announcing DOUG! Announcing BILL!
To All WheresCoolers,
Hi. I’m Bill. I’m new here. I sit next to Ron. My specialty is Clip Art.
Guess What?!?! No Mom, I’m not coming out of the closet. Yet. WheresCool.com has a totally kick-ass, brand-spankin’- new look!!
How? Well, I locked Ron in a basement with a laptop, a canteen full of bourbon and some religious pamphlets and 6 months later he emerged heavily bearded, a dress sizes thinner and a little peeved. HOWEVER, he emerged with the coolest product the likes of which rival the ‘Sham-wow’!
This, if you can’t already tell, is the monthly email shout of WheresCool.com – travel reviews of cheap, indie, underground and seriously authentic stuff to do around the world. Mmmmm…that rolls off my tongue like a tilde’ constructed of ball bearings and Vaseline.
$3.2 million Film Release by WheresCool Gets 6 Nominations!
In the spirit of the up-and-coming Oscar’s, WheresCool.com has just launched their first short-film starring none other than the BRAD PITT! Check it out here! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qP-1rnWiIqI Looks like Angelina likes her man with corrective lenses! Link it on your myspace or facebook!
New Features! Forum? Forhim? Forearm?
Ron tells me we now have a ’forum’. Since I don’t know what that means you will have to go onto the site to check it out and forum the shit out of it.
Contest Announcement! Win for Adding Stuff. 1st Prize: Not Me!
Check out the new design and tell us what you think. And while you’re checking out all the pretty new colors and the fancy new bells and whistles maybe you could add a thing or two????
I need some new places to check out! Bars, restaurants, venues, places to travel to…anything that will let me escape the sad lonely existence that is Bill. (Insert frownie face)
So log on to your favorite new site www.wherescool.com and add some shit pronto, Tonto. Or I will show up at your house with a half drank bottle of Jack D and hang out during your next date. Trust me, you don’t want that - I drink like a fish, cry like a girl, and steal like a three-armed gypsy*. Hope you win!
Cordially Yours,
Bill
Lead Botanist, Certified Yellow Belt & President
*Disclaimer. I have nothing against three-armed gypsies. It’s those two-armed gypsies you have to be weary of. Also, I am 1/15th Gypsy so chill before you write me a letter.
